It has been awhile since I wrote here. And here we are again. The world has changed tremendously for the past 5 months. Cooped up in our houses forces us to appreciate our families and friends.
Life has upward slopes and downward troughs. That’s what every motivational session will ask you to draw, the curves. I thought my curve has stopped being in the valleys but it went deeper. Into the infinitesimal darkness. In April, it has been so dark that every shadow swallowed other shadows. Every fear feeds on other fears and eat me inside out.
But now, I guess I’m at the impossible part of that dark hole. You know, the parts where you can see some light. Actually a lot of light. But sometimes, when you’re in a trough for too long, you’re scared to put too much hope in hope itself. Does that make sense?
Of all the holes that I’ve been through, this one had been filled with a lot of kindness from other people. It has been a less lonely journey. Especially that one soul, who never gives up on me despite me being engulfed in negativity. Darkness and fear changes you in ways you don’t know. But it does.
I decided to start writing again because of the insomnia. And also because I read books that inspired me to write. Mostly, internal monologues. Do you find that when you read more, you want to write more?
I just finished a John Green book. And like all John Green books, it is without wisdom and science facts: two combination of things that I love.
I can’t remember the quotes from the book, as usual. Will include it later.
~S.H.
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